We often hear people say life is short, but many of us do not really feel its weight until something shakes us—a loss, a milestone birthday, or a quiet moment of realizing how quickly time passes. The truth is, life moves fast. We wake up, go through our routines, handle responsibilities, and suddenly years have gone by. That is why the words of the speaker I saw on a Facebook reel hit differently. They were not wrapped in complicated ideas. They were simple and direct. Life is short. Do not waste it on complaints, grudges, regrets, blame, or pretending to be sad. Instead, focus on a mantra: minimize pain, maximize pleasure, and do the most good.
It sounds easy to follow, but living it out takes deliberate choices. Complaining is a habit that sneaks in quietly. A little traffic? We vent. A delay in plans? We sigh and share our frustration. But complaints do not really fix anything. They only take up mental space and drain the energy we could use for solutions. Choosing not to dwell on complaints does not mean we ignore problems. It means we recognize them, act if we can, and let them go if we cannot. It is a shift from reacting to responding. That small change alone can free us from a lot of unnecessary emotional weight.
Himutok, or the constant expression of disappointment, can be heavier than it seems. Sometimes it shows up as telling and retelling a sad or frustrating story. While it might feel like we are just processing our emotions, repeating them without moving toward resolution can trap us in the same loop. Life is too short to keep replaying old frustrations. At some point, we have to decide to stop rehearsing the hurt and start rehearsing hope.
Panghihinayang, or regret, is another thief of joy. We all have moments we wish we handled differently, opportunities we missed, or choices we would change if we could. But regret keeps us looking backward, and the past will never rewrite itself. A better approach is to take the lesson and carry it forward. We cannot undo what has been done, but we can make sure the next choice is wiser because of what we learned.
Then there is paninisi, the act of blaming. Blame feels satisfying in the moment because it shifts responsibility away from us. But over time, it becomes a trap. It keeps us from taking control of our lives. If everything is someone else’s fault, then we lose the power to make changes. Owning our role, even in small ways, gives us back that power. It means we can do something different today instead of waiting for someone else to make things right.
The last on that list is lungkot-lungkotan, which can be described as staying in a state of sadness even when we could step out of it. Life gives us real reasons to grieve, and those moments deserve space and compassion. But sometimes, sadness becomes a comfortable blanket. We hold onto it because it feels familiar or because it brings attention. The challenge is knowing when the season of sadness has done its work and it is time to return to joy. Choosing joy is not pretending problems do not exist. It is deciding not to let them dominate our entire view.
When the speaker said the mantra—minimize pain, maximize pleasure, and do the most good—it was not just a catchy line. It was a framework for living. Minimizing pain starts with letting go of unnecessary suffering. Not all pain is avoidable. Life will bring challenges, loss, and discomfort no matter what we do. But we often add extra layers to it. We replay slights in our minds. We tell ourselves stories about how unfair everything is. We focus on what is missing instead of what is present. By catching ourselves in those moments and choosing a lighter perspective, we give ourselves room to breathe.
Maximizing pleasure is not about living selfishly or chasing instant gratification. It is about noticing and making room for the things that bring us joy, meaning, and energy. It can be as simple as watching a sunset without rushing to take a photo, savoring a meal instead of eating in front of a screen, or laughing with friends without checking the clock. Pleasure does not have to be expensive or elaborate. The key is being present for it. When we are truly present, even small pleasures feel rich and memorable.
Doing the most good is where this mantra becomes more than just personal happiness. Pleasure and low pain are wonderful, but life gains deeper meaning when we contribute to something bigger than ourselves. Doing good does not have to mean grand gestures. It can be as small as offering a kind word, helping someone without expecting recognition, or showing up for a friend in quiet ways. Goodness multiplies. When we give it, we often receive it in return, even if not from the same people we gave it to. The effect can ripple far beyond what we can see.
The beauty of this mantra is that the three parts support each other. When we minimize pain, we have more space for pleasure. When we maximize pleasure, we have more energy and motivation to do good. And when we do good, our sense of fulfillment grows, which makes both minimizing pain and finding pleasure easier. It becomes a cycle of living well.
Living this way requires mindfulness. It is easy to slip back into old patterns of complaining, regretting, or blaming. Sometimes we will catch ourselves mid-sentence and realize we are feeding the very habits we wanted to avoid. That is normal. The goal is not perfection but awareness. Each time we notice and choose differently, we strengthen the muscle that helps us live according to the mantra.
It also helps to surround ourselves with people who share the same outlook. Energy is contagious. Spend too much time with those who thrive on negativity and it will feel harder to maintain this way of living. On the other hand, being around people who choose gratitude, joy, and kindness can inspire us to keep going, especially on hard days.
Another important point is that minimizing pain and maximizing pleasure should never be at the expense of doing good. If we only focus on our own comfort and joy, we risk living a shallow life. The most lasting kind of pleasure often comes from knowing we have made a difference, however small, in the lives of others. Even in seasons when our own life feels heavy, acts of kindness can lift our spirits. Helping someone else is sometimes the most effective way to help ourselves.
There will always be reasons to complain. There will always be regrets that try to whisper what could have been. Blame will always look tempting when things go wrong. Sadness will sometimes feel like the safest place to stay. But every day gives us a choice. We can carry these weights, or we can put them down and walk lighter. The lighter we walk, the more room we have to notice the beauty around us, enjoy the moments we are given, and extend goodness to others.
Life is short, but that is not meant to scare us. It is meant to remind us to live intentionally. When we live with this mantra in mind—minimize pain, maximize pleasure, and do the most good—we are not just passing time. We are filling it with meaning, joy, and kindness. And that, more than anything else, is what makes a short life a full one.
